Receiving a sincere compliment can easily make anyone's day brighter, and actually does this by releasing the feel-good chemical dopamine into your brain. But where a little bit of well-deserved praise is important to your well-being, a constant need for it is just the opposite.

"Wanting people to approve of you is very pervasive in our society. Most of us feel that without others approving of who we are and what we do, we have no value," says Hale Dwoskin, CEO and Director of Training of Sedona Training Associates..

This need for approval may indeed cause you to become an expert fisherman for compliments. Regular compliment addicts may:
  • Subtly turn most every conversation back to their own achievements
  • Ask you questions that inevitably demand a compliment (Do you like my hair? How was the speech I gave?)
  • Seek out your attention by reminding you of their past successes


Why do people fish for compliments? To feel validated, worthwhile and confident - all things that they have a hard time feeling from within.

The problem with craving compliments from others is that you risk never feeling fully complete. What is missing is your own inner strength and value, both feelings that you depend on others to give you.

But if you could feel completely at ease with yourself without needing an outside compliment, would you? Well, there's good news: you can.

"Whether or not you gain praise or validation from others, it is your own love or validation that is most important and that you are totally in control of," Dwoskin says.

Best of all, he says, "You can give yourself approval at any time and let go of wanting praise from others. As you do this you gain confidence in yourself as you are, and the addiction to others' praise falls away."

To provide yourself the approval that you're currently seeking from others, all you need to do is use The Sedona Method. This simple tool will teach you how to let go of your need for approval, as well as the negative feelings that may be contributing to your lack of inner confidence.

"Be open to the praise you receive from the outside, and simply let go of your need for, or dependence on, this praise," Dwoskin says.

"The happiness that is always right within you will reveal itself to you," he continues. "Also, when you are not looking for or craving praise but are OK within yourself whether or not praise is forthcoming you are most open to actually receiving it."