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How to Live Alone Again or for the First Time and Love it

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  • How to Live Alone Again or for the First Time and Love it

    Living arrangements, even those that seem set in stone, can suddenly be turned upside down. A divorce. A death. Leaving your parent's home for the first time. Graduating college. All of these life events can mean that you're suddenly living on your own.

    Living alone can, in fact, be one of the most fulfilling experiences of your life. Aside from the obvious pluses of not having to take anyone else’s opinions into account when you want to decorate, have people over, watch TV or stay in your birthday suit all day, living alone can be a time of deep introspection.

    This is a time when you can learn how to feel content with yourself, even get to know yourself, and be comfortable whether there are others around or not. Of course, this can be challenging, particularly if you’ve gotten used to always having someone else there.

    Indeed, many people panic at the thought of living alone, and may even try to fill the empty space in an inappropriate way. And this is one of the worst things you can do.

    'Many times when you find yourself alone you may rush into filling the void by the other person's absence,' says Hale Dwoskin, CEO and director of training of Sedona Training Associates. 'When you do this you often can make mistakes in relationships. It is better to at least give yourself some time to adjust to not having someone else around before you rush into another situation or another relationship.'

    And though it may feel like you’re the only one who is living alone … well, you’re not alone. In fact, the proportion of households consisting of one person living alone increased from 17 percent in 1970 to 26 percent in 2005, according to the U.S. Census Bureau.

    How to Live Alone and Thrive

    Unfortunately, living alone is not always the ideal way of life that many people imagine, and as a result those living alone may have a hard time feeling positive. Well, this negative attitude will only attract more negativity to your life. So the bottom line of how to live alone, and love it, is to change your attitude about living alone.

    “If you find yourself living alone well after getting used to having other people around it is important to remember to keep your own inner council,” Dwoskin says.

    This way, you can build yourself up or fill the “void” even if you’re alone. It’s important, also, to seek out things in your life that you find fulfilling, and never adopt the mindset that you somehow can’t have those things because you’re living alone. After all, if that’s your mindset, that will become your reality.

    So it really is to your advantage to love every minute of your lone living arrangement. If you're having a hard time doing this, The Sedona Method can help you to release your negative feelings.

    'It's helpful to release on any loneliness, wanting to fill the void or incompleteness that may arise in this important transition,' Dwoskin says. 'As you keep releasing, you find yourself feeling a lot more comfortable whether you're alone or with people. And if you're open to it you will find that the right people or the right person comes into your life at just the right time.'
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