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What is Normal? What is the "Right" Basis of How You Should Feel and Live Your Life?

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  • What is Normal? What is the "Right" Basis of How You Should Feel and Live Your Life?

    Is it normal to be happy all the time, and those of you who feel sad, angry or anxious from time to time are abnormal? Or, does the opposite hold true, and feeling a range of emotions is normal, while those who are always happy are the strange ones?

    As it turns out, there may be no such thing as normal, only natural.

    "What most of believe is normal is really not natural," says Hale Dwoskin, CEO and director of Sedona Training Associates. "What is natural is to live life each day fully present, alive and engaged, feeling relaxed and in control moment to moment."

    In other words, normalcy is not about any particular feeling -- happy, sad or otherwise. Instead, it is living in the moment, whatever it may be.

    Why is striving to be always happy perhaps not the wisest way to live? Because if you do this you put yourself into the emotional state of always wanting.

    You'll always be yearning for happiness because "chronic happiness" is extremely difficult to attain, says psychologist Sonja Lyubomirsky, PhD from the University of California, Riverside.

    This is because your mind has an uncanny ability to adjust to what's going on in your life, both positive and negative. If your income suddenly gets cut in half, it may be tough at first, but your mind will adapt to it. Likewise, if your pay is doubled, you may first be elated, but rest assured your elation will die down.

    Lyubomirsky says this tendency of the mind to quickly adjust to positive things in your life puts people on a "hedonic treadmill," which causes them to continually seek out short-term mood boosts.

    "The problem with wanting things is that the more you get, the more empty you feel because you cannot get what you are looking for by fulfilling most desires. As soon as you get what you want, a new feeling of lack arises and you set off trying to fill that void as well," Dwoskin says.

    This is why you're better off living in the natural way -- in the present moment -- than striving to be constantly happy.

    What's it Like to Live Naturally?

    "When you live each day fully in the present, you know that you can handle whatever life brings because you have the tools to create what you desire, and you let go of all that arises that you do not," Dwoskin says.

    "You feel at home and safe in the world and can enjoy everything much more completely," he continues. "Issues and areas that started out tense and out of control become less and less so over time, and you find that even difficult situations become more manageable."

    How can you learn to live "naturally"? It's all about gaining not happiness, but rather a positive mental attitude that sticks with you during the good and bad times. It's also about keeping your mind focused on the here and now, because that's the only time you have any control over anyway.

    You can gain a positive mental attitude by learning the principles of The Sedona Method.

    The Sedona Method is based on the premise that you do not have to program positive thinking. All you need to do is to liberate your natural positive nature. This natural positive attitude requires much less effort and struggle to achieve and maintain.

    Your emotions create your conscious and subconscious thoughts, and your thoughts either put you into action or prevent you from acting. When you perceive you are being held back by your negative thinking, attitude or behavior, The Sedona Method will help you to release this negativity and get you back into the present.

    "When living naturally, you have a growing clarity about right action and trust your own inner knowingness," Dwoskin says. "You feel love and compassion toward your fellow man and woman and have much more rich and rewarding relationships."

    "Your health also improves," he continues, "because you have removed the dis-ease that causes most sickness. You make more money because you can easily maintain a positive mental attitude. In short, The Sedona Method is the key to natural and effortless living."
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