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  • What to Do If You've Been Laid Off or Fired: The Right Emotional Steps

    In January 2009, 598,000 Americans working in the private sector lost their jobs. This latest round of layoffs brought the unemployment rate to 7.6 percent, up from 7.2 percent in December.

    In all, nearly 12 million Americans are now unemployed, a statistic that paints a bleak picture for those who have been recently laid off. With so many in the job market pool, competition is steep, and emotions are often shaky.

    Fear, anxiety, depression, anger, shame and guilt are just the tip of the iceberg when it comes to the emotional impact of being laid off. Unfortunately, all of these natural emotions are also the very ones that will hinder your ability to regroup and move on. So what, emotionally, should you do, if you are laid off?

    “The thing to do if you've been laid off is to remember that in any economy there are always jobs,” says Hale Dwoskin, CEO and Director of Training of Sedona Training Associates. “So rather than giving up, allow yourself to get into action to find the right new position for you.”

    In order to do this, you've got to first get into the right emotional mindset, and here are the steps to get you there:
    Don’t panic. It's natural to have a million worries after being laid off, but if you panic, you are essentially giving in to all of them. Instead of letting fear and panic get the better of you, stay calm and take things one day at a time.

    Get in control of your emotions by letting go. Your emotions create your thoughts, and your thoughts either put you into action or prevent you from acting. Your emotions actually determine your own blueprint for prosperity. And if you want your blueprint to be a successful one, you need to first develop the right attitude by letting go with The Sedona Method.

    “The best way to keep yourself on track and to feel good about yourself as you're doing it is to let go using the Sedona Method,” Dwoskin says. “This will help you to accept what has happened and find the courage to move on to greener pastures.”

    There are several great ways to release on both being laid off and on your next steps to take.

    “Allow yourself to review the job you just lost and release on both the things you liked and disliked about that position,” Dwoskin says. “This way you won't be carrying any excess baggage from your last job. Also, set up a clear goal for what would be your ideal next position. Then, allow yourself to release all the feelings inside of you that may be saying you can't or are holding you back.”

    Avoid feeling like a victim.
    If you have a victim mentality, you may feel like you're always the unlucky one and there's nothing you can do about it. This sets you up for nothing but continued failure because it shrouds you in negativity. The Sedona Method can help you to release the self-limiting beliefs that are causing you to be stuck in a victim mentality, and help you see that you can land the job you've always wanted.

    Make a list of action steps. These are the immediate actions you can take to help you find a new position.

    “Allow yourself to release on each action step until you feel courageous about taking the action,” Dwoskin says. “Releasing on the actions will also help you to discern which actions are correct for you and which are not.”

    Realize that you are not your job. Many people center their whole identities on what they do for a living. But you are much more than that. If you’ve been laid off or fired, take the time to remind yourself of the things that are most important to you, and which truly define who you are. This could be your spirituality, your family, your drive to help those around you, and so on.

    Invest in yourself. Being laid off can do some damage to your self-esteem and self-image, but it need not. Once you are unemployed, and even if you simply feel uncertain about your job security, begin to look at yourself as a small business, one in which you need to invest in to be successful. On a practical level, this means networking, re-educating yourself if necessary, revamping your resume, and so on.

    But you must also invest in yourself emotionally in order to be successful, and the best way to do that is by letting go using The Sedona Method. This is the most effective emotional process to uncover your positive emotions and propel you toward success. The more you let go, the more you will find that investing in yourself is easy. You will clearly see the next steps you need to take to gain financial security and achieve the lifestyle you want.

    Those who use The Sedona Method agree that it is not a luxury in the current economy; it is a basic survival and thrival tool. This is why, if you have any friends or loved ones who have recently been laid off, or fear they might be, passing on this article to them is so important for their financial future.

    Letting go is very powerful, and the more you use it, the easier it will be for you to turn an unfortunate situation such as a lay off into something positive … that often will leave you even better off than you were when you started.
    Purchase Letting Go Movie on DVD http://www.lettinggo.tv/moviedvd/
    Purchase Beyond Letting Go http://www.lettinggo.tv/beyond-lettinggo/
    Purchase The Sedona Method Course http://www.sedona.com/transform
    Learn The Sedona Method in 2 hours. http://opti1.lettinggo.tv/smc-quickstudy/

  • #2
    Please help..

    Since my husband passed away suddenly in March, filed bankrapcy in May and got fired from work in June..
    I can not afford to invest myself at all at this moment - I started learnning the sedona method with a book right after being fired.
    I started feeling a little better but I am still greving my husband death and so scared of being unemployment..my biggest scare is money..- no insurance money from my husband death and no unemployment benefit due to being fired..it is running from it and I am actively looking for a job but no luck at this moment. I purchased the movie and it helps me to release the emotions but it won't last long.
    Please someone advise me what to do..
    Last edited by Boo68; 08-25-2010, 05:02 AM.

    Comment


    • #3
      Finding Support

      Hi Boo68,

      sorry to hear about your circumstances.
      You can find support in these Forums in these challenging times. And watching the movie now and then (perhaps with friends too) will help you release further and using the book will help you - just keep going with releasing. It might not immediately change your circumstances, but you'll feel betther and from a this better place it is easier to take the necessarry steps for yourself.
      And when you feel stuck, ask for help.

      The triple welcoming process is very powerful to use also:
      • could you welcome whatever is in the moment (feelings, thoughts, sensations, memories, pictures)
      • Could you welcome any want to change or fix that, and could you welcome any aversion and attatchment to that
      • could you welcome any judging yourself or others
      • could you welcome any sense this is personal, about you or who you are?


      And repeat until you feel more peaceful, open, expanded or neutral etc.

      You'll also find a lot of valuable information in for example the Letting Go Articles Forum, with almost 700 articles by Hale. You can use the 'search' function at the top of the home page to search for 'unemployement' etc.

      You might want to ask for a free coaching session to get you going. We happen to have a very good Japanse coach if you want to release in your own language! You can find him in the Coaches section. Or else all other coaches, including myself, are happy to assist you.

      Clarie
      Last edited by Clarie van de Langenberg; 08-25-2010, 03:42 AM.
      sigpic
      Clarie van de Langenberg --- Sedona Method® Certified Coach
      E-mail: coach@sedona-methode-coaching.nl - http://www.sedona-methode-coaching.nl
      Sedona Methode Nederland - Facebook group: http://www.facebook.com/home.php?sk=...690791391&ap=1
      Reconnect Yourself - Facebook Page https://www.facebook.com/ReconnectYourself
      Official Sedona Method websites: http://www.sedona.com - http://www.lettinggo.tv

      Comment


      • #4
        Hi Boo68,

        Clarie wrote such a wonderful post and I think everything she and Hale suggests here would be so helpful.

        I am just writing to share that there have been times in my life when I was worried about the very basics like a having a home and food on the table and I know how frightening and even overwhelming that can be. I found that welcoming wanting security and wanting control was extremely helpful. I had a tendency to deny wanting those things because I knew about the concept that wanting equaled lack. What I ended up doing was resisting those wants and I just became more and more contracted and more and more anxious. As I allowed myself to welcome wanting them more and more I found myself gradually feeling calmer and calmer. In this calm place I could more readily let them go because I was no longer contracted but relaxed and open. Clarie mentioned that when we feel better we are better able to take action steps to address the circumstances in our lives. This is an important piece of TSM for me. It's true that as I keep releasing I experience all kinds of wonderful surprizes, people wanting to give me things for free, money coming unexpectedly, but what I also notice is that I just function better, I can get more done with less effort and anxiety when I release.

        Keep releasing and think about having a free releasing session with one of us coaches to support your process. Let us know how things go,
        Delilah
        www.theaccordcenter.net

        Comment


        • #5
          Dear Clarie and Delilah,

          Thank you very much for your advise. I did release with the tequniues and I started feeling better - especially releasing for wanting for control and safety. Every time I release something and go deepr and found out that they are underlying my desire..
          I happened to get invited Coach Susan's free telephone conference this afternoon but I did not have the opportunity to ask her for help due to the number of the paticipants. I really appreciate if both you guys can keep supporting me ..
          Here are some questions, how long should I release a day? Are there any recommendation or limitation?
          Since being fired from work, I feel like I am a loser so is there a good release techinque for it?

          Thanks,

          Comment


          • #6
            You are enough & Holistic releasing

            Hi Boo68,

            in answer to your questions:

            Here are some questions, how long should I release a day? Are there any recommendation or limitation?
            Since being fired from work, I feel like I am a loser so is there a good release techinque for it?
            There are no limitations to releasing.
            You might take a look at this Tips posting from Annie & Tim - this gives a lot of helpful hints to release during the day and still be playful with it:

            LINK: http://www.sedonamethodcommunity.com...-constant.html

            About the feeling of being a loser: do you have the DVD of Letting Go movie? There is a beautiful bonus part there, with a groupsrelease Hale is doing: You are enough. This is about the feeling you are not enough or you feel you don't have enough. Wonderful to release along with.

            Also a holistic release can be helpful:
            • could you allow yourelf to feel like a loser as much as you do in this moment?
            • Could you allow yourself to feel like a winner as much as you do in this moment


            Repeat this 7-9 times for yourself until you feel more peaceful, space etc.

            We tend to look at one side of the coin - but there are always 2 sides!
            In the beginning you may feel not much with the word winner ior even resistance, welcome that too if you do.

            A variation on this is:
            • could you allow yourself to hate feeling like a looser as much as you do in this moment?
            • could you allow yourself to love feeling like a looser as much as you do in this moment?


            Again, the word love in this context might stir up some feelings - allow yourself to welcome that too. With holistic releasing you dissolve the different polarities into each other.

            Just keep releasing, and remember to enjoy the time you don't feel the need to release and just feel okay!

            Clarie
            Last edited by Clarie van de Langenberg; 08-26-2010, 01:44 AM.
            sigpic
            Clarie van de Langenberg --- Sedona Method® Certified Coach
            E-mail: coach@sedona-methode-coaching.nl - http://www.sedona-methode-coaching.nl
            Sedona Methode Nederland - Facebook group: http://www.facebook.com/home.php?sk=...690791391&ap=1
            Reconnect Yourself - Facebook Page https://www.facebook.com/ReconnectYourself
            Official Sedona Method websites: http://www.sedona.com - http://www.lettinggo.tv

            Comment


            • #7
              Hello again Clarie and Delilah,

              I would like to update my status..
              I did a lot of releasing of wanting of security, survival,controlling and approval based on the advise.
              I also released negative feeling toward my former employer,too. Then I started feeling calmer and calmer and started feeling fearless.
              Guess, what happened next....my unemployment benefit request was granted after three month I requested!(I had the opportunity to talk to the investigator to explain my circumstance and situation but I did not expect that my request was granted.) I am financially ok now.
              I still have no luck for finding the job but now I can prove SM works! so I keep releasing on finding a job.
              I really appreciate your advise.
              Last edited by Boo68; 10-06-2010, 09:05 PM.

              Comment


              • #8
                Great reached goals Boo68 and great advices Clarie and Dalilah Thank you!
                Do what you do when you are doing it, and don't do what you are not doing when you are not doing it!

                Comment


                • #9
                  Originally posted by Boo68 View Post
                  Hello again Clarie and Delilah,

                  I would like to update my status..
                  I did a lot of releasing of wanting of security, survival,controlling and approval based on the advise.
                  I also released negative feeling toward my former employer,too. Then I started feeling calmer and calmer and started feeling fearless.
                  Guess, what happened next....my unemployment benefit request was granted after three month I requested!(I had the opportunity to talk to the investigator to explain my circumstance and situation but I did not expect that my request was granted.) I am financially ok now.
                  I still have no luck for finding the job but now I can prove SM works! so I keep releasing on finding a job.
                  I really appreciate your advise.
                  Hi Boo68,

                  thanks for sharing your gains with us! It's wonderful when you are in the flow like that.
                  And yes, releasing really works!

                  The releasing you did is also very helpful for your next step, finding a new job. You are in a better and calmer place (so to speak) to do your upcoming job interview and choosing the job you prefer.


                  If you want to work with the Goals process, you could word a goal to find a job you enjoy.
                  Example: 'I allow myself to effortlessly find a job I enjoy'
                  With this (or the goal in your wording) you could play with the advantages/disadvantages questions. E.g.:
                  what do you like about finding a job [you enjoy]
                  welcome whatever comes up. is this related to a want to control, for approval, security, separation or oneness? Can you let that go?

                  What do you not like about finding a job [you enjoy]
                  welcome whatever comes up. is this related to a want to control, for approval, security, separation or oneness? Can you let that go?

                  And go back and forth between those two polarities until you feel quiet, happy, expanded or fearless etc.

                  (You can find more information about the advantages/disadvantages process in the Sedona Method book and on the basic audio course).

                  Keep us posted!

                  Clarie
                  Last edited by Clarie van de Langenberg; 10-08-2010, 04:14 AM.
                  sigpic
                  Clarie van de Langenberg --- Sedona Method® Certified Coach
                  E-mail: coach@sedona-methode-coaching.nl - http://www.sedona-methode-coaching.nl
                  Sedona Methode Nederland - Facebook group: http://www.facebook.com/home.php?sk=...690791391&ap=1
                  Reconnect Yourself - Facebook Page https://www.facebook.com/ReconnectYourself
                  Official Sedona Method websites: http://www.sedona.com - http://www.lettinggo.tv

                  Comment


                  • #10
                    Originally posted by BenvsWeb View Post
                    In January 2009, 598,000 Americans working in the private sector lost their jobs. This latest round of layoffs brought the unemployment rate to 7.6 percent, up from 7.2 percent in December.

                    In all, nearly 12 million Americans are now unemployed, a statistic that paints a bleak picture for those who have been recently laid off. With so many in the job market pool, competition is steep, and emotions are often shaky.

                    Fear, anxiety, depression, anger, shame and guilt are just the tip of the iceberg when it comes to the emotional impact of being laid off. Unfortunately, all of these natural emotions are also the very ones that will hinder your ability to regroup and move on. So what, emotionally, should you do, if you are laid off?

                    “The thing to do if you've been laid off is to remember that in any economy there are always jobs,” says Hale Dwoskin, CEO and Director of Training of Sedona Training Associates. “So rather than giving up, allow yourself to get into action to find the right new position for you.”

                    In order to do this, you've got to first get into the right emotional mindset, and here are the steps to get you there:
                    Don’t panic. It's natural to have a million worries after being laid off, but if you panic, you are essentially giving in to all of them. Instead of letting fear and panic get the better of you, stay calm and take things one day at a time.

                    Get in control of your emotions by letting go. Your emotions create your thoughts, and your thoughts either put you into action or prevent you from acting. Your emotions actually determine your own blueprint for prosperity. And if you want your blueprint to be a successful one, you need to first develop the right attitude by letting go with The Sedona Method.

                    “The best way to keep yourself on track and to feel good about yourself as you're doing it is to let go using the Sedona Method,” Dwoskin says. “This will help you to accept what has happened and find the courage to move on to greener pastures.”

                    There are several great ways to release on both being laid off and on your next steps to take.

                    “Allow yourself to review the job you just lost and release on both the things you liked and disliked about that position,” Dwoskin says. “This way you won't be carrying any excess baggage from your last job. Also, set up a clear goal for what would be your ideal next position. Then, allow yourself to release all the feelings inside of you that may be saying you can't or are holding you back.”

                    Avoid feeling like a victim.
                    If you have a victim mentality, you may feel like you're always the unlucky one and there's nothing you can do about it. This sets you up for nothing but continued failure because it shrouds you in negativity. The Sedona Method can help you to release the self-limiting beliefs that are causing you to be stuck in a victim mentality, and help you see that you can land the job you've always wanted.

                    Make a list of action steps. These are the immediate actions you can take to help you find a new position.

                    “Allow yourself to release on each action step until you feel courageous about taking the action,” Dwoskin says. “Releasing on the actions will also help you to discern which actions are correct for you and which are not.”

                    Realize that you are not your job. Many people center their whole identities on what they do for a living. But you are much more than that. If you’ve been laid off or fired, take the time to remind yourself of the things that are most important to you, and which truly define who you are. This could be your spirituality, your family, your drive to help those around you, and so on.

                    Invest in yourself. Being laid off can do some damage to your self-esteem and self-image, but it need not. Once you are unemployed, and even if you simply feel uncertain about your job security, begin to look at yourself as a small business, one in which you need to invest in to be successful. On a practical level, this means networking, re-educating yourself if necessary, revamping your resume, and so on.

                    But you must also invest in yourself emotionally in order to be successful, and the best way to do that is by letting go using The Sedona Method. This is the most effective emotional process to uncover your positive emotions and propel you toward success. The more you let go, the more you will find that investing in yourself is easy. You will clearly see the next steps you need to take to gain financial security and achieve the lifestyle you want.

                    Those who use The Sedona Method agree that it is not a luxury in the current economy; it is a basic survival and thrival tool. This is why, if you have any friends or loved ones who have recently been laid off, or fear they might be, passing on this article to them is so important for their financial future.

                    Letting go is very powerful, and the more you use it, the easier it will be for you to turn an unfortunate situation such as a lay off into something positive … that often will leave you even better off than you were when you started.
                    This is something so often in our lives, so in case someone didnt see this great text I am pulling it out to be seen Great advices of how to deal with these situations.
                    Do what you do when you are doing it, and don't do what you are not doing when you are not doing it!

                    Comment


                    • #11
                      How Do I Overcome Fear and Anxiety

                      Three years ago, I left the office job I'd been at for 17 years to become an independent contractor. I'd originally intended to stay at that job until retirement, because I loved it, but the company drastically changed my last years there and made me such a nervous wreck that I quit to be my own boss. But now work is dwindling and so is my bank account, and I am in tremendous fear about running out of money, yet also extremely phobic about going back to a job -- the exact thing that would solve my money problems. I've developed GAD and a racing heartbeat that starts hammering away as soon as I wake up in the morning. I've been to doctors and therapists, but nothing seems to really help this self-destructive anxiety. I can't even think about interviews or read job ads without going into panic. I've been in fear for years, and this is not living -- what releasing can I do to get over my phobias be confident and not have fear completely run -- and ruin -- my life anymore?

                      Comment


                      • #12
                        Hi MRL,
                        I've been an independent contractor all my life, as an actor, in film production, real estate sales and investing, and am a Sedona Method Certified Coach. I invite you to email me, and let's set up a releasing session (for free, of course). Anxiety used to be my middle name...releasing changed it, quickly. In the interim, can you simply welcome any wanting to change your situation, any wanting to fix it, any wanting it to be different? Can you simply welcome the sense that it is personal to you? That it is your anxiety? Can you, in this moment, as best you can, open inside and allow it to release? Just a little bit, can go a long way!
                        Regards,
                        Tim
                        tim@esedona.net
                        Tim McCavitt Sedona Method Instructor
                        http://www.sedonareleasingworldwide.com
                        info@sedonareleasingworldwide.com

                        Comment


                        • #13
                          Tim, thanks very, very much for the personal, telephone releasing session. I've felt so much anxiety melt away -- it's a beautiful (and new!) feeling, and I look forward to what will unfold in the coming days as I continue to release. For anyone else who feels like fear is running their life, who feels trapped by anxiety and depression, I highly recommend a personal session with a Sedona Method coach. It's like a beacon of light in the darkness. Thanks again, Tim, for your compassion and guidance, and for giving me hope!

                          Comment


                          • #14
                            "For anyone else who feels like fear is running their life, who feels trapped by anxiety and depression, I highly recommend a personal session with a Sedona Method coach. It's like a beacon of light in the darkness"

                            I agree with you MRL ( I also had my first releasing sessionswith Coaches lately) I am glad you feel much better now

                            Do what you do when you are doing it, and don't do what you are not doing when you are not doing it!

                            Comment


                            • #15
                              Hi MRL,

                              My pleasure. As the feelings appear, remind yourself what you shared with me from the Letting Go movie: "feelings are just feelings, they're not facts, they are not you...and they can be released!" Again, I applaud your courageosness in asking for a session...and in the effortless releasing that followed! Let us know how you are doing!!

                              Love,
                              Tim
                              tim@esedona.net
                              Sedona Method Coaching worldwide is life coaching using The Sedona Method®
                              Tim McCavitt Sedona Method Instructor
                              http://www.sedonareleasingworldwide.com
                              info@sedonareleasingworldwide.com

                              Comment

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