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Deciding to drop vs welcoming

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  • Deciding to drop vs welcoming

    I think I have been successfully using the method with good results.
    However I have noticed that for me "welcoming" almost always works better and for "deciding to drop" I'm sometimes not sure how much it worked.
    For welcoming, I just focus on the feeling(s) and keep feeling the feelings without judgment, and then after a while I feel kind of "bored" with it and stop, realizing the feeling is gone.
    However when I decide to drop, I feel as if the other option("No" if I choose "Yes") is still there after I answer. An analogy would be as if decide to buy a thing (a book, a gadget, a piece of clothes etc.) and feel I can still go back and exchange it, rather than deciding what to eat at a restaurant (usually there is no going back once you order).

    Anyway, I want to make sure if I'm doing it right. I just "decide" yes or no honestly to the questions ("could you, would you, when"), right?
    And I keep going back to the procedure until the issue is gone, correct?
    But it seems I have a problem here...I don't usually feel the issue is completely gone after repeating several times(always feel some remnants).
    I feel like always I could "go back" to the problem like the analogy above, wheres with welcoming I feel the issue to be completely gone (at least at the point).

    I am being honest when I answer "yes" or "No" and at least I don't feel I'm forcing anything.

    So I use welcoming more, but I want to use "dropping" more too because I want to have another option and also at some occasions it is more easier to do.

    Any advice is most appreciated.

    Thank you.

  • #2
    Like peeling an onion our emotions have many layers, there are still emotions after we've let go. Yet layer by layer the onion gets smaller as you keep peeling (releasing) You getting it if in the moment you notice some sort of change after releasing.

    When stuck, you can ask yourself, could I let go of wanting to change this?



    • #3
      Yes Alex, I understand that in theory. The reason I ask this is the difference is noticeable compared to welcoming. Like I wrote, with welcoming the emotion is mostly gone when I finish. I wouldn't have asked this if the results seemed to be equal. So I would think either welcoming is better tool at least for me or I'm doing it wrong somewhere. Additional opinions/thoughts are appreciated.


      • #4
        Hi terrym!

        Dropping it or letting it go are really the same thing. A lot of people have trouble just dropping it or letting it go at times and that's why we have the other process like welcoming. You are not doing anything wrong at all. In fact you are doing it exactly right. ...If it were easy to let go or drop something all the time we wouldn't need to explore all the other processes that support a let go. Welcoming is the second most fundamental way to let go after dropping it. And it's really wonderful and very powerful way to let go. In fact the better welcomer you become the better releaser you become!