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about knowing the source of the feeling (i.e. why I feel this way)

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  • about knowing the source of the feeling (i.e. why I feel this way)

    Hi,
    I understand that to let go of a feeling you do NOT have to know where the feeling is coming from or why you feel that way, is it correct? For example, if you get irritated by looking at something, then you can just let go of irritation without knowing why it gives you irritation, right?

    I have been releasing this way and sometimes it worked greatly but sometimes the feeling just came back again and again. But I noticed that when I actually know where the feeling comes from or why I have the feeling, it is much less likely for the feeling to come back after releasing it. Here is an example. Whenever someone posted a self-help quote on Facebook, I used to get annoyed. You would probably know what kind of posts I'm talking about - for example, "Be there for the others, but never leave yourself behind" or quotes like these. Whenever I saw these quote posted by someone I got annoyed but I released this annoyance and I was fine. It was not really big of a deal anyway. However even though it was let go at that point it always came back(I got annoyed again). I didn't know why. I let go every time. But recently I just realized that I was annoyed because I felt condescended. It's like "I know it is a great quote, but I don't want to be told by you." So it's like pride. Once I realized this, the feeling disappeared without even trying to release it and never came back.

    This is a typical example and my experience is that the more I pinpoint the source of my feeling, the better my releasing is. However I often read advice here saying you don't need to pinpoint the source of a feeling and /or you don't even have to name the feeling and you can release a feeling as a feeling (without a name). Did I possibly misunderstand the advice and it is recommended to look for the source of the feeling as much as possible? If not, how should I understand my experience?

    Thank you.

  • #2
    It's one of the reasons why Hale asks, Does it come from wanting, approval, security, control etc. It helps you to dig a little deeper and release a little deeper.

    Alex

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    • #3
      Originally posted by Sedona Training -- Alex View Post
      It's one of the reasons why Hale asks, Does it come from wanting, approval, security, control etc. It helps you to dig a little deeper and release a little deeper.

      Alex
      Hi Alex,
      Yes I do break it down to the 3 wants when I follow the "methods" (or whatever you call them) like, goal setting or advantage/disadvantage process etc. But I thought it wasn't required to do that when you release emotions arising in the daily life(i.e. I could just release that emotion or welcome it as they arise). Also, when you know what kind of emotion you have (fear, anger, etc.) I thought it was not required to dig deeper into "why." For example, the first part of the TSM book says "remember the last time you or someone else experienced this emotion/feeling." but I noticed that releasing works better when I know (for example) "I'm angry at him because he asked me to do something which I don't like to do" than "I'm somehow angry at him." It would work even better when I know "I'm angry at him because he asked me to do something and he didn't ask so and so!(could have asked someone else!)"

      So the more precisely I know the source of the emotion, the better releasing works. In other words, when I understand the structure of my emotion/feeling, it can easily let go.

      Do you recommend breaking it down (check what is behind my feelings/emotions) every time?
      Also, would breaking it down to the 3 wants better?

      Thanks.

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      • #4
        "I'm angry at him because he asked me to do something which I don't like to do"
        Is the reason you didn't want to do it because Do you want to control, approval, security, separation or oneness?

        [qu "I'm somehow angry at him." Do you want to control, approval, security, separation or oneness?

        It works even better if you know where you're coming from

        You may also welcome the what ever is there.

        If it didn't release completely the first time release some more, release it again as it shows up. And every time it shows up you can choose to release. When you sit down to do releasing see if you can release to courageousness, acceptance or peace.

        Alex

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        • #5
          HI terrym!

          Yes, it's not necessary to know what the source of the feeling is...what's interesting is that if you keep playing around with letting "it" go the source the feeling often comes to the foreground. It's kind of like letting go of wanting to figure "it" out. When we let go of wanting to figure it out, the answer, information, understanding, insight etc appears.

          Also, welcome not knowing what "it" is. And release on wanting to figure out what "it" is. Play around with that too and see what unfolds.

          Best,
          Delilah
          www.theaccordcenter.net

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