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  • Stuck on a goal - wanting to lose weight

    Embarrassment came up when even writing that topic which is an indicator of how I feel about the goal, I suppose.

    I think there's embarrassment around wanting anything at all now that I'm welcoming this all...

    anyways. I've gotten this far, may as well carry on. I want to lose some weight, and feel pretty. I just don't as I stand at this weight, I've attempted to release on this for years in a multitude of ways, and even though it's lead me to healthier eating and exercising regularly, it just feels like I'm constantly waiting and can't get to where I want to be. And it's frustrating, it literally feels like there's something I can't see. Something from blocking any releasing on this goal in any way, and it's been like this for a while.

    to be fair, I did get my dream body for a short period of time by following a very strict diet and constantly working out, which didnt last. And then I gained even more weight back and it's been even more painful to know I can have it but.... can't

    asking for help is a bit of a last resort for me, so if anyone has insight, it'd be appreciated

  • #2
    And as it happens Hale did a live recording on the subject yesterday on Facebook https://www.facebook.com/TheSedonaMe...BR_S8p4jl93sus I recommend checking the video to learn more.

    You can sign up 6-Day Live Releasing Series (via telephone or Internet)
    Monday, January 15 through Friday, January 19, plus Monday, January 22
    12:00 p.m. Pacific Time and 6:00 PM Pacific Time
    5 payments of $50
    Learn more and enroll at www.Sedona.com/Weight-Loss


    Alex

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    • #3
      Hi chickpea!

      I agree with Alex' suggestion to check out Hale's Weight-Loss series. It is sure to be fantastic!

      It's great when we are able to get in touch with embarrassment about the goal of loosing weight.
      It's great because it gives us a chance to release on the embarrassment. The whole food/weight story is
      often fraught with so much shame and frustration and embarrassment.

      Let's start with one of the things you mentioned in you post. You wrote: to be fair, I did get my dream body for a short period of time by following a very strict diet and constantly working out, which didnt last. And then I gained even more weight back and it's been even more painful to know I can have it but.... can't

      It might be useful to start with exploring the process that goes like this:

      I know I can have my dream body but i can't because____________(fill in the blank).
      What want does that stir up?
      Welcome that want.
      Could I let go of wanting that want?
      Could I let go of wanting to get that want from not having your dream body?
      Could I let go of wanting to get that want from having your dream body?

      Please keep us posted on how things unfold for you,
      Delilah

      Last edited by DelilahCertifiedSMCoach; 01-11-2018, 12:57 PM.
      www.theaccordcenter.net

      Comment


      • #4
        Originally posted by chickpea View Post
        Embarrassment came up when even writing that topic which is an indicator of how I feel about the goal, I suppose.

        I think there's embarrassment around wanting anything at all now that I'm welcoming this all...

        anyways. I've gotten this far, may as well carry on. I want to lose some weight, and feel pretty. I just don't as I stand at this weight, I've attempted to release on this for years in a multitude of ways, and even though it's lead me to healthier eating and exercising regularly, it just feels like I'm constantly waiting and can't get to where I want to be. And it's frustrating, it literally feels like there's something I can't see. Something from blocking any releasing on this goal in any way, and it's been like this for a while.

        to be fair, I did get my dream body for a short period of time by following a very strict diet and constantly working out, which didnt last. And then I gained even more weight back and it's been even more painful to know I can have it but.... can't

        asking for help is a bit of a last resort for me, so if anyone has insight, it'd be appreciated
        Hi chickpea,

        I'd like to offer you some hope. I've had a life-long experience of "being fat". From being bullied for being fat in my childhood, having the related self-esteem issues that affected all areas of my life, constant body discomfort, diets, exercising until exhaustion, losing weight, gaining it again, etc. For 30 long years, every day I've felt fat and wanted do to something about it, but was unable to make lasting changes.

        Through the years I've found many things that have been somewhat helpful, but the Sedona Method has definitely given me the tools to deal with this issue once and for all. I now feel great, exercise easily and regularly, and have little issues with food choices. Funnily enough, when I started with Sedona Method a year ago, I had "bigger" problems in my life, so I never set a health goal or did any specific releasing to lose weight. All I did was release the feelings related to body discomfort, exercising and food as they were coming up. And they were coming up a lot. All I had to do was notice them, notice how I wanted to change these feelings and let it all go. It did take a while and the feelings definitely weren't pleasant, but they did go away eventually.

        For me it was a combination of things that I was "fighting" that was keeping me stuck with the weight issue. I thought it may be helpful for you to look out for similar thoughts or feelings and let them go. Your situation most likely will be different, but I'll list the main "hooks" that were holding me back:

        First of all, it was the very feeling of "being fat". I realised that I always had it, even when I was underweight years ago after going on a strict diet and exercise regime. When I started letting go of it, I realised how badly I want it to go away. That was a "hook" too - I had to let go of wanting to change it before it could go away.

        The feeling of "getting fat" after you've eaten, especially if you are conscious about the food you're eating and the amounts of it. Ever had a doughnut and immediately felt the "I am getting fatter" feelings everywhere in your body, especially the parts of it that you feel the least comfortable with? It may be followed by:

        Guilt and shame feelings after you've eaten.

        Wanting to control food before, during and after you eat. Wanting to control the amount of food you have and/or how healthy or un-healthy it is. Wanting to change how much you've just eaten. Even though you can't change the past. Funny, right?

        Resisting unhealthy food and/or lust for unhealthy food. The feeling of "I want this but I can't have it because it will make me fat".

        Discomfort with your body image in public and all associated thoughts. And wanting to change that image and the thoughts.

        Resistance to exercising. This was a big one for me. We have so much will-power we can resist and push ourselves through anything, which eventually makes "forcing ourselves" to exercise very difficult. Try noticing if you think that you should exercise, or you should go to the gym. And just welcome it. Also notice any feelings of anticipating difficulty before exercising. When you let go of resistance there is no need to force anything, it's effortless, regardless if you decide to exercise or not.

        And finally, the resistance to what you see in the mirror and wanting to change your body. This is probably the most important thing of all. You may find the release Supercouse CD 18, Track 4 helpful. Everything else will follow.

        Hope this helps.
        Last edited by Vaidas; 01-14-2018, 11:03 AM.

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        • #5
          that's fantasic suggestions above!

          I personally feel, after reading your post, you might want to try goal with other things? don't have a weigh problem, but why I suggest this way is so that you might be seeing how the process of gaol stating works.
          I will probably try to have a diet go like:
          I allow myself to eat much and enjoy while I exercise easily or I exercise with enjoyment too. goals like this, I don't come directly to the goals orareas I care very very much.... At some other aspect,
          o I could know where is a easy place to start on to have things easily manifest for me.
          Last edited by digowind; 01-14-2018, 06:49 AM.

          Comment


          • #6
            Originally posted by digowind View Post
            that's fantasic suggestions above!

            I personally feel, after reading your post, you might want to try goal with other things? don't have a weigh problem, but why I suggest this way is so that you might be seeing how the process of gaol stating works.
            I will probably try to have a diet go like:
            I allow myself to eat much and enjoy while I exercise easily or I exercise with enjoyment too. goals like this, I don't come directly to the goals orareas I care very very much.... At some other aspect,
            o I could know where is a easy place to start on to have things easily manifest for me.
            Hi digowind,

            Thanks for your suggestion and funny you should say this as I have been working on certain goals and failing to achieve them for quite some time. But hopefully your suggestion works for chickpea.

            All the best,
            Vaidas

            Comment


            • #7
              Hi folks!

              What a wonderfully loving, supportive and generous share Vaidas!

              And what a great suggestion digowind! It may be exactly what chickpea feels like trying but if not it's a great suggestion for others to consider!

              <3 <3 <3,
              Delilah

              www.theaccordcenter.net

              Comment


              • #8
                Originally posted by DelilahCertifiedSMCoach View Post
                Hi folks!

                What a wonderfully loving, supportive and generous share Vaidas!

                And what a great suggestion digowind! It may be exactly what chickpea feels like trying but if not it's a great suggestion for others to consider!

                <3 <3 <3,
                Delilah
                Thanks Delilah, it's a pleasure to share.

                Comment


                • #9
                  These are all gold tidbits. Delilah, the "I want but can't" exercise is phenomenal. Vaidas, thank you for your insights! I didn't even realize all the wanting to change my feelings, it was a lightbulb. A number of things came up that I surprised myself with, and to be honest I can't remember them because they just left! Gone!
                  ​​​​
                  I am actually looking leaner in the past few days since making this post. I'm hesitant to write it or admit it though, and I want to change that. Release on that, and what just ca,e up is because it means I was ashamed of the past. Could I welcome wanting to change feeling ashamed?

                  Ooh.... the wanting to change feeling ashamed, that I think I'm going to be unleashing something here, in several aspects. I'm curious, this is starting the feel quite fun!
                  ​​​​​​

                  ​​​

                  Comment


                  • #10
                    Hi chickpea!

                    That's wonderful! So glad you are feeling movement!

                    Yes, releasing is fun. Freedom is fun. Flow is fun.

                    Warmly,
                    Delilah
                    www.theaccordcenter.net

                    Comment


                    • #11
                      It's interesting, I'm definitely leaning out, and as I'm getting it I'm noticing wanting more, more more, and frustration that I'm not losing more which I suppose is lust. But I'll have to look at that. I'm also noticing the impulse to both restrict food, and binge on "unhealthy food," and that I'm hungry and somewhat... fearful? or disappointed?

                      So I guess theres more to this topic than I anticipated, and I'm noticing I'm resistant to that, I'm expecting pain and tediousness and.... work. Could I notice what expectations are built in this? what hopes?

                      And EDIT: Again with Vaigas, could I notice how much I want this weight and this issue to be resolved, go away, just not exist?
                      Last edited by chickpea; 01-19-2018, 01:51 PM.

                      Comment


                      • #12
                        Hi chickpea!

                        Looks like you are doing very well in finding things to release on.

                        Good job!
                        Delilah
                        www.theaccordcenter.net

                        Comment


                        • #13
                          Wanting to change that I do.eat so healthy (cause yes I want to eat sugar and I want to be able to just binge and eat as many oreos in one go as I want and not worry about it.) Wanting to get rid of this problem so I can stop worrying, but I can't because (hmmmm there's lust over worry there.) I don't have time to be dwelling on this, I'm too busy, ect.

                          I've noticed, my partner is so fit and gorgeous, I can see every muscle in his body. I want that. He can also eat like a horse (he estimated his intake is 5000 calories a day.) Just thinking about that gives me a heart flutter. When Im lm lying with him I just feel so.... huge. And I know I'm not even "fat" but im on the higher end of nornal but I cant give the feeling up.

                          hmm. There's a statement there, "I know I'm not fat but I believe I am because..."

                          I also just noticed, feeling large = feeling like a protector? I suppose I have always equated size with protection. As in height and thickness, this may be why Ive always maintained a certain size but never was overweight. Being strong has always been important to me too.

                          I did get drawn to a non-dominant hand journaling exercise which gave me some surprising things, namely indicating a desire to be and feel physically touchable, which I really don't feel I am, and a desire for a captive listener. I wonder how much I've been suppressing by trying to release, I've noticed I really do not want to talk about much to anyone I'm in contact with in the world, another body mind aha.

                          fun stuff

                          Comment


                          • #14
                            I've realized I can make a couple of goals around this, one releasing anxiety and fear and stress around eating, and one having the body of my dreams. This could be a good holistic release for me as there is resistance around having both coexist in harmony

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                            • #15
                              I'm tremendously glad I posted here and started poking around the forum again, there's been major insights. I'm more relaxed around food and my body, and I'm noticing changes. Some, and they're subtle, but they're there. Also on releasing, a lot has been coming up. For instance, wanting to have a great body, but being afraid of attention from strangers (just now came up - not wanting to have to explain myself.) Resistance to being sexy or sexual, wanting to deny being attractive, being seen as innocent? Being insecure about being seen as attractive, wanting to get attention to change that. Hah! Contradiction! Or beliefs that what I have to do to be attractive isn't attractive - so wanting approval. So I've been wanting it to be easy and effortless so I can get approval for it being so easy and effortless. Wanting to be special right there. Wanting to hide my attractive features so I can be seen as special and attractive anyways

                              hah! Look at all those contradictions! Disapproval of myself for being so vain. Believing I'm vain? My goodness... and a story I should be handwriting this privately because that's more effective. Hah! Apparently not!

                              this is great. Thank you all for being here with me

                              Edit: I'm on a roll. If I'm sexy/hot I'm going to get in trouble (childhood mantra yo.) People are allowed to have preferences (always read about something as an excuse to feel rejected, wc/wbc,) needing to be stoic.

                              On dressing down my appearance/fearing or rejecting attention and being checked out - I could be or get it of I wanted. I could look like that if I wanted. I have different/better priorities - disapproval of myself and others, wanting approval. Guilt over feeling this way towards people/women/men, wanting to be special.

                              I really want to feel special or significant!

                              A damn feels like it broke! Bahahahaha
                              Last edited by chickpea; 01-27-2018, 08:40 AM.

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