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Gains and Realizations of a 23 year old

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  • #61
    Hey folks,

    It's been a while since I've posted.

    I've had some great gains, but also some large challenges. I'd lost the habit of releasing before, but now I'm getting back into it, because frankly, this is all very overwhelming:

    1. A lot of student debt. My wife will finish school soon, and I'm thinking about the looming student loans she has to pay off and how that's going to affect us. I don't even know how to phrase a goal statement around it and I'm even embarrassed to say how much she owes. Anyone have a positive way of stating a goal involving debt and loans? I've got a large story around it, and it's definitely affecting how I perceive my wife. (I can't believe I started this thread in 2012 when I was 23. Next year I'll be 30!)
    2. The challenges of moving to a new country next year. Going through the immigration process is very anxiety producing. Just trying to deal with that.

    On the plus side, I am really enjoying the work I'm doing. It's been a long time since I've felt so good about work. There's a part of me that's terrified that I'll have to go back to a soul crushing job in order to make the payments on her forthcoming loans once she's done school.

    Some challenges in my path for the upcoming new year, but nothing like challenges to galvanize me back to releasing (or did the challenges come because I stopped releasing? Hmmm).

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    • #62
      Originally posted by JennyAndrze View Post
      Hi Sandmandr,

      I'm 25 years old and have been releasing for about three years. It sounds like you are picking all of this up very quickly which is awesome.

      Two things:

      1. I really enjoy releasing on paper. Sometimes when I'm trying to release in my mind, I get distracted by thoughts and stories and emotions that are swirling around and I never get to releasing. This is my method for "paper releasing". Lets say something comes up and I feel motivated to release. I go into my room and start jotting down everything I think and feel. My notes look something like this. "I wish I had more money. I hate money. I'm afraid of being broke. I'm afraid of being rich. I want to stop playing this game of life. I feel pathetic. My mother is bad with money and it's her fault I'm broke." When I feel that I've exhausted all the thoughts and feelings swirling around, I start to release. I write down:

      Welcome the story
      Welcome wanting to change
      Welcome wanting to understand
      Welcome wanting to make it a special, unique problem
      Welcome the feeling of it being personal or about me
      Let go / Let it unravel

      After I do each one of those steps I give a check mark. Sometimes I repeat it 4 times, other times I just rest in "letting go" if the release is happening on its own. Hope this is helpful for you, it's been working well for me.

      2. I know it seems counter-intuitive, but the more you make anything a big & significant problem, the more it will stick around. I often get the mental image of a Chinese Finger trap. The more you use force in order to free yourself, the tighter the trap becomes. You must surrender to the trap in order for it to loosen. "Problems" are the same way. I am still struggling with this concept myself (after this I'll release on wanting to change stuckness), but when I explore a problem emotionally instead of trying to force it out of my consciousness, I always get relief.

      Last thing! Letting go of wanting to become "unstuck" is one of the most powerful releasing tools. I always forget about it.. and I'm glad I've remembered it again. Take care!
      Hi Jenny

      I know that this is an old post, but I think your method sounds great and effective. Do you do the welcoming steps on each of the thoughts you wrote down about the topic?

      All the best, Esben

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