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Best use of SM for breakup and life changes

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  • Vivek
    replied
    You're welcome, Tim. Working on the resistance itself has helped me immensely in dealing with my own issues.

    Leave a comment:


  • timothycrawshaw@hotmail.com
    replied
    Hi again,

    Susan, thanks for your input, epecially accessing what Im feeling right here, right now....I listened to a recording of a 5th way seminar and eventually got in touch with the ISness I am in this moment, I had a terrific experience of letting go of lots of pain, resistance and anger which lightened my mood for a couple of days.

    Vivek, thanks for the two pennies worth, I have an awareness of the HUGE levels of reistance I have to my circumstance. Incidentally, two of my friends, guy and girl (who are also housemates) have started becoming quite close and I feel really left out of things and sensitive since my breakup, making being comfortable around them quite difficult. This is making me want to isolate even more.....but i will keep working on resistance and see if this helps

    Cheers

    Tim x

    Leave a comment:


  • Vivek
    replied
    If there is difficulty accessing the emotional state, maybe it's because of resistance? Maybe you are shoulding yourself too much in relation to the problem. Why not first work on the resistance? If there is any resistance, what need(s) would that be trying to meet? Just my 2 cents worth.

    Leave a comment:


  • DelilahCertifiedSMCoach
    replied
    Originally posted by [email protected] View Post
    Hi community,

    I love reading these pages and find so much benefit from peoples wisdom/insights that I thought it was about time to post myself and seek some assistance.

    As the title of the post suggests, I recently came out of a two year relationship with my girlfriend (a mutual decision). We have been an intense couple and I have remained in a job Im not keen on to be geographically closer to her. Since breaking up I find myself totally lacking focus, loss of self-confidence, taking pleasure in my favourite hobbies and withdrawing from social activities. I have taken several steps to stay healthy, i.e. eating well, exercising, taking care of my appearance and seeing a counsellor but find it difficult to access the emotional content to allow for letting go. Im also giving myself a hard time about how Im handling it i.e. not being positive and 'moving on', saying sorry to people for expressing how Im feeling

    I think I have the same problem as a lot of releasers of (head releasing), but I would love to hear from people who have any helpful personal experience

    Love

    Tim
    Hi Tim,

    See if you can allow yourself to start with where you are right now.

    You mentioned that you find it difficult to to access the emotional content to allow for letting go.

    See if that is here right now.

    If yes, then can you allow yourself to experience that fully. Notice all the thoughts, feelings, sensations, and images that are part of that experience.

    Often when I ask clients to do this they ntoice that there is a lot going on that is part of the experience of not being able to access emotional content. Sometimes they feel sad or frustrated or numb or empty or disconnected or tight or fuzzy etc. These are all things that can be welcomed and fully experienced in awareness.

    Even if you are a so called head releaser, see if you can welcome the whole experience that you are calling head releasing. Check all the thoughts, feelings, sensations, memories, fantasies and see if you can welcome them. See if you can open to them fully. Notice the head as well as the rest of the body and welcome the apparent split.

    Are you wanting to change or control your releasing experience?

    Could you welcome that?

    Could you let that go?

    Would you?

    When?

    Could check and see if there is a feeling that this is about you, or how you release?

    Could you welcome that feeling?

    Would it be Ok if that feeling just dissolved?

    When?

    Let us know how things unfold,
    Delilah

    Leave a comment:


  • Best use of SM for breakup and life changes

    Hi community,

    I love reading these pages and find so much benefit from peoples wisdom/insights that I thought it was about time to post myself and seek some assistance.

    As the title of the post suggests, I recently came out of a two year relationship with my girlfriend (a mutual decision). We have been an intense couple and I have remained in a job Im not keen on to be geographically closer to her. Since breaking up I find myself totally lacking focus, loss of self-confidence, taking pleasure in my favourite hobbies and withdrawing from social activities. I have taken several steps to stay healthy, i.e. eating well, exercising, taking care of my appearance and seeing a counsellor but find it difficult to access the emotional content to allow for letting go. Im also giving myself a hard time about how Im handling it i.e. not being positive and 'moving on', saying sorry to people for expressing how Im feeling

    I think I have the same problem as a lot of releasers of (head releasing), but I would love to hear from people who have any helpful personal experience

    Love

    Tim
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