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Troubles with letting go

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  • Troubles with letting go

    I couldn't find any board in which to write about my troubles with letting go, so I decided to do it here.

    1) It's really hard for me to sometimes keep up with the questions in these release processes. When I start concentrating on an issue, I get some feelings and then there's the question: could you let wanting to change whatever sense of stuckness you might be feeling right now? Umm... ok... wait!... what? It's sometimes hard to even get the right mindset for letting go but then I need to figure out about what I'm letting go of. Not the stuckness, but the wanting to change the stuckness. My concentration is really poor and this all just goes waaaaaay over my head when I'm in the process.

    Ok, I'm feeling stuckness in this area of the subject. Do I want to change... umm... the feeling of stuckness... in this area of the subject? Yeah... I guess. Ok, could I let go (ok ok... I'm letting go now, concentrate) of wanting to change the feeling of stuckness (let go of the feeling... no... the wanting to change the feeling... umm... damn...) in this area of the subject? What was the subject again? Where was the feeling of stuckness? Oh, ok, I feel the stuckness again... what was the question?

    2) Each time I start working on a subject, even if I stick to the simple methods, I fel like I'm starting from beginning. First I can let go just ok few times, the I get distracted, then let go some more, then get frustrated, then let go of the frustration, then get overwhelmed, then let go of that... then just give up. And the same thing the next day (or next time I do this). Aren't the feelings supposed to be gone for good? On the other hand in the book Hale says "If you've ever pruned a tree, however, you know that branches often come back healthier than before." So which is it? They're gone forever or they come back healthier than before?

    3) I really have hard time letting go sometimes and even trusting that I'm doing it right. For the longest time I even did't get what letting go was supposed to be. Not sure if I know it now. Sometimes I just welcome everything, since in the book the step 2 says "Ask yourself one of the following three questions: Could I let this feeling go? Could I allow this feeling to be here? Could I welcome this feeling?" So, that seemed to help a bit. Sometimes I just allow everything and that works in some little things quite well, too. But then the later processes go: "Could you welcome the feeling? Then could you let it go?" So is welcoming the same thing as letting it go? Is allowing the feelings to be there letting go of them? What IS letting go? This bok is REALLY messing me up.

    4) I listened the audio track when I joined the forum. That was great. I felt like it cleared up some of the confusion that I had about the method, but at the same time I felt like it confused me more. Hale says that people think the need to get rid of their emotions or only have good feelings or something like that. And if you only welcome feelings, that makes sense. You don't need to get rid of feelings but just be free of their power over you. But then I always seem to get this sense, that the feelings are supposed to be gone. You only get them back if you think they're gonna come back, as Hale said in one of the audio bits I found from the forum. So, is letting go somehow different than welcoming? Am I supposed not to have the feeling after I've let it go?

    5) Then this questions like "Could you allow yourself to feel peace and perfection etc.?" again just go over my head. Sure I can allow it. Doesn't seem to do anything. Why wouldn't I allow them? I want to be at peace and feel the perfection and whatever. Of course I allow them by default. What are these questions supposed to accomplish?

    I might come across a bit frustrated, but that's just because I am. I'd be very grateful if someone could clear this stuff up for me. I'm really not the brightest guy out there.

    Thanks.
    "The secret to creativity is knowing how to hide your sources."
    -Albert Einstein

  • #2
    Hi Ianuarius
    Welcome to the forum. It sounds as if you aren’t sure if you are releasing correctly and if you aren’t sure if you are getting results.
    You wrote:
    Sometimes I just welcome everything, since in the book the step 2 says "Ask yourself one of the following three questions: Could I let this feeling go? Could I allow this feeling to be here? Could I welcome this feeling?" So, that seemed to help a bit. Sometimes I just allow everything and that works in some little things quite well, too.
    If you are doing this then you are releasing. It’s sometimes frustrating to let go and feel good and then have more come up. But what you’ve released is gone. You can’t really go back in time and feel what you felt last week or a year ago, though it sometimes seems that way. You can remember what you felt then and the memory might stir up a feeling that shows there is some attachment to the ‘story’. So you can then welcome that.
    I also find it easier to welcome than to ‘let go’. That’s probably because I spent too long trying to let go, which isn’t really letting go, but wanting to control. When I welcome there’s no trying involved and so it happens naturally.

    As far as some aspects of this being 'over your head’: don’t worry too much about that, and just use the processes that work for you. When you are ready then the understanding will come. The mind does just run around in circles trying to get this. When we stop and allow understanding comes. I can relate to your sense of wanting to have some evidence, and to your frustration as I have felt that way too.
    You write:
    Sure I can allow it. Doesn't seem to do anything.
    Are you watching for it to ‘do’ something, and thinking you should be different in some way? I’ve done that too, and it is wanting to control the outcome of the releasing. Eg If I feel upset that I have been too rigid with my daughter and I release my feelings on that to try to stop being rigid, I am really not releasing but trying to control my behaviour. With this way I am going to be on alert to see what happens and the slightest thing could have me convinced there has been no change. But if I release my feelings just because I want to free to live in a deeper, clearer way, then I will allow what happens to happen and if I notice what seems to be an old pattern recurring I will welcome that and be open to the possibility it could just mean there is still some aspect of it I have yet to release. (In this example most likely I would be wanting approval.)
    Sometimes changes happen all at once and it feels great, and other times it seems that nothing has happened and then I realise days later that I am doing things differently and it did make a difference.
    I hope this helps. I also recommend having a few sessions with a coach. I have just had 6 weekly sessions with Liesbeth and it has made a huge difference to my releasing. A coach helps you move beyond these mind games into the clearer space beyond.
    Last edited by Evie; 06-13-2011, 12:33 PM.

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    • #3
      I really appreciate your wisdom. Thank you.

      I would love to go to a seminar or to have a coach personally nudging me to the right direction. It's just that I don't think there is that kind of stuff here in Finland. There isn't even translated version of the book, yet.
      "The secret to creativity is knowing how to hide your sources."
      -Albert Einstein

      Comment


      • #4
        Hi again Ianuarius,

        Glad to be of some support. I’ve been where you are. (or where I imagine you are!)
        You don’t need to go anywhere to work with a coach. Most coaches use skype. Just take a look around the forum and read the coaches’ posts and then you can send a private message to any you think you’d like to work with. Most of them offer a free session first of all so you can even try it out that way and see who you feel you’d like to work with. David Ellzey regularly comes to Europe. I went to a seminar of his last year in Holland, and I think he’s doing Sweden later this year, which would be nearer for you. Check out his website.
        (You can find the list of coaches by clicking the “Coaches” button above.)
        Good luck and happy releasing.
        Last edited by Evie; 06-13-2011, 01:01 PM.

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        • #5
          I listened that 9 day retreat audio clip when I registered to the forum. The thing that gets me releasing is imagining Hale asking with his dreamy voice: "So, could you welcome that?" It just makes me wanna welcome everything. I don't really know why. I'm guessing it's the energy behind his voice, but when I ask myself: "Can I welcome this?" I rarely get the same result.

          Oh, another query I found useful was: "If this feeling was trying to get going, could you let it go?"
          "The secret to creativity is knowing how to hide your sources."
          -Albert Einstein

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          • #6
            Whatever works, go with it. Listen to that clip again, keep imagining his voice. I’d guess you’re right about the energy and that Hale is asking from acceptance. Sometimes I can ask that way, and other times it’s more of a demand, so the result doesn’t come. You say you rarely get the same result, and I noticed on your other post you haven’t been doing TSM for long, so remember to be patient with yourself. Remember Hale’s been doing it a long time!

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            • #7
              Oh, I bought the book, I think, three years ago and I've been doing releasing randomly... or at least what I thought at the time was releasing.

              Maybe my understanding about the subject has deepened now and I can actually release stuff because of that. So maybe the results will come.
              "The secret to creativity is knowing how to hide your sources."
              -Albert Einstein

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              • #8
                I am in the same boat as you, if you find any answers I would great appreciate if you would share them with me

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                • #9
                  Yours in freedom,
                  Stephen

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                  • #10
                    I didn't know Hale was in Penn & Teller's Bullshit!



                    "He is a licensed..... real-estate agent." Classic.

                    The thing is that those kinda shows make me... angry. And I know why that is. Because deep inside I really don't believe that Sedona Method works. Still I keep doing it because I hope I'm wrong.
                    Last edited by Ianuarius; 06-14-2011, 02:11 PM.
                    "The secret to creativity is knowing how to hide your sources."
                    -Albert Einstein

                    Comment


                    • #11
                      Ian, Hale himself admits he didn't go "free" till after Lester Levenson had passed on, which only confirms that the method is simple but it is not easy. Hale shares that he only missed two or three Sedona retreats when living in New York City (working as a real estate agent then, not now). He doesn't keep these things a secret.

                      But I agree that there can be an absolute conflict of interest when a self-help organization exists to make a profit. Businesses have known forever that the ideal plan is to create residuals. In the self-help industry I believe Zen calls this type of person "hungry ghosts". That is, they're hungry for more spiritual information, but they don't take it in. They become addicted to the pursuit.

                      I do remember attending a weekend seminar and Hale mentioning about a project that he was involved in with Jack Canfield. Hale said he pulled out because, I believe he said, that he was uncomfortable with the amount of money Jack was going to be charging. So, I do believe that Hale has his limits and I do believe his interest truly is in helping people. But to your point, I am sure there are plenty of people who have attended many of the retreats and have purchased many, if not all, of the CDs and are no closer to realizing their goal. But do remember, Lester always talked about taking personal responsibility for our path.

                      With the Sedona Method, it doesn't take anyone to change a light bulb. The bulb can do it all by itself, but it is going to have to want to change.

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                      • #12
                        Oh, no, no, that wasn't my point at all. Sounds like you're projecting your own ideas, but what do I know.

                        My point was, like I said, that deep inside I don't believe that sedona method works and when people say that out loud it makes me angry. For the longest time I've been telling others that law of attraction and sedona method work but never got any results with them myself. People are joiners, like Penn & Teller put it. They like to be part of something. The ego gets angry when its bs stories are challenged. I don't really mind anymore... I think I released that art yesterday.

                        Bullshit is a great show. They don't really do their research either, but watching this stuff really brings up some of my strong beliefs about the world and the universe. I believed in recycling. Now I'm not sure anymore. I believed in organic food. Now I'm not sure anymore. I believed that fast food was bad for you. Now I'm not sure anymore. And I really didn't question these things before. The facts don't matter. I believe that being hootless matters.

                        I've read Hale's real-estate stories from the sedona method book and I'm not saying that he should have other degrees and diplomas etc. I just appreciate the humor of the show.
                        "The secret to creativity is knowing how to hide your sources."
                        -Albert Einstein

                        Comment


                        • #13
                          Just noticed that most of my questions haven't been answered yet. Does this mean that there are no answers or that no one just knows them?
                          "The secret to creativity is knowing how to hide your sources."
                          -Albert Einstein

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