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Releasing emotions works beautifully, releasing wants excruciating

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  • Releasing emotions works beautifully, releasing wants excruciating

    Hi everyone,

    I've been releasing or attempting to get this stuff right for a couple of years now. When I release emotions directly I instantly feel lighter and happier, more loving, the usual stuff. But when I attempt to release the wants it doesn't work at all. I end up apathetic and frustrated, often to the point of having headaches, painful body sensations, or feeling completely numb. However, once in a while (maybe every month or so) I'll be able to shift out of this state and feel alive and happy and the wants will fly out easily as soon as they come into awareness and everything is great. This only lasts an hour or so though until I get 'stuck' again.

    In my current stuck state, as soon as I become aware of one of the wants I feel tense and painful and frustrated. This kinda sucks because I'm perceiving all my feelings as culminating in those wants all day!

    I've tried everything I can think of or get my hands on. I think my massive breakthroughs happen when I honestly let go of wanting to control or change the stuckness but that is only a suspicion. Last time I got unstuck was when I was reading the 'steps to release the wants' bit in the sedona method book which was explaining how to get unstuck when stuck. It hasn't worked since. I don't think I'm successfully letting go of wanting to change or control the stuckness if 2 seconds later I'm checking to see if it worked.

    Oh, and letting go of wanting to change or control a feeling that I'm feeling doesn't work to release it for me either. It's like the whole chapter in the SM book about your key to serenity doesn't work for some reason. The only thing that works to release feelings is letting them go directly (as is shown in the first part of the SM courses)

    I really want to get Step 5 (and releasing in general) working for me. Is wanting Step 5 to work the opposite of Step 5? Probably. Could I let go of wanting to control the stuckness of wanting to control the stuckness? Nope!

    I'd be eternally grateful if anyone can help me.
    Last edited by releaser2011; 11-22-2011, 03:56 AM.

  • #2
    Hi releaser 2011,

    I am sure you will get a lot of helpful advice from coaches, and for now two things spring to mind -

    1) if releasing feelings works for you, then keep doing that and don’t worry too much about trying to release wants. If trying to is keeping you feeling stuck but you really would like to ‘master’ it then perhaps give yourself a break from it - maybe decide to not try to release wants for one day and see what happens.

    2) The other thing I’d suggest is if you haven’t already tried the Triple Welcoming it is a great way to release, particularly I think if you experience stuckness or resistance. I can really relate to what you write as I have often felt very stuck, and still sometimes do, but it does get easier to accept that and to trust that all is well. A few sessions with a coach made a huge difference to me, so I really recommend that.

    Good luck with releasing and welcome to the forum.

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    • #3
      I think I've come to the conclusion that I'm somehow holding the wants in my body instead of letting them go for good, thats why my body feels yucky after trying to release. If I 'let go of wanting to control the wants in my body', I feel better, and releasing comes a bit easier, but still not 'flowing'.

      Does anyone have experience with this or any suggestions on how to remedy it?

      Thanks!

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      • #4
        I had the same experience ,what really worked for me was "the cleanup procedure" ... it helped me feeling my feelings .. i mean REALLY ... I can now feel them in all my body and can let them go more easily .. Hale describes in the book how doing the cleanup procedure on his mother,had the same impact on him ..
        Once i did the cleanup on my tuition teacher from my childhood , i feel as if i have let go of the cement in my legs .. really it felt like cement like stuff is going out of them ..

        wanting to change your body sensation/pain after releasing will help
        Doing the cleanup on your parents will undoubtedly help.
        I would recommend using cleanup on a person from childhood with whom you had troubled or difficult experience..
        Hope it help..

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        • #5
          Thanks Khan! I'm doing it now and I'm getting a lot of body sensations and I feel a bit lighter also.

          I think also something that's helping a lot is "letting go of wanting to control that I've been having difficulty letting go". Before I was letting go of wanting to control the stuckness/difficulty that I was experiencing IN THE NOW MOMENT. I thought that you could only let go of the stuckness that was here now, but apparently not. Wanting to control the stuckness that I've experienced in the past also has to be let go of so I don't keep bringing it into the present moment. So let go of wanting to control that I've been having difficulty letting go, not only that I'm currently having difficulty letting go, is what I'm doing and it seems to be working.

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