I've had two situations now when I've released on an issue and felt amazing. It felt like I could release any emotion after that and I definitely felt courageous, it felt like if I just stayed in that emotion my whole life I wouldn't need anything else eg money or accomplishments because it felt so good, that I didn't really need anything else. The problem is after these two incidents whenever I release and don't feel this way I get dissapointed, I feel lack to what is. I've tried accepting it but it's still there. I just want to be able to release and feel that way again but it feels like I'm lacking the emotion. I know hale said that good emotions are unlimited but this seems wrong from my viewpoint, how can they be unlimited if I've only been in this experience of joy twice and than I'm in apathy or a lesser emotion the rest of the time. All I want is to be in this state again but I don't know how because it seems to be random when releasing works, sometimes I'll ask for half an hour and just get more frustrated, sometimes I'll be able to easily let go and it seems to be out of my control which happens, even if I work on accepting bad emotions or letting go of wanting to change.
My question is is it possible to always be in this state? Or do I have to accept not being in this state. Shouls I release to try achieve this state again or should I just release to accept not being in this state?